I woke 3am one morning last week feeling terrified about money. There’s something about early morning darkness that exaggerates fear. Questions (or accusations?) plagued my mind…
Am I stewarding my money rightly?
Am I wasting money?
Can I really trust God and keep spending, investing, building…?
Have I been presumptuous or reckless or entitled or mismanaging or..?
Did God really say… ?
Ok. Ok. At that point I realized this was way more than my own fear manifesting. Ive learned from experience not to allow my thoughts to get away especially at that time of morning. It only ends bad. So I knew I had to get back to what Holy Spirit has said and is saying about my current situation.
Instantly I had a thought (It’s probably God) reminding me of the story of the disciples in the boat when they forgot to bring lunch (think resources… money for me). All I remembered in the moment was that what they were worried about, Jesus thought was irrelevant. THAT was enough to get me back to sleep with a reminder to check it out first thing in the morning.
When I got up at my normal time I tracked down the passage. I found it in Mark 8 and was reading The Passion Translation.
The disciples had just come from a miracle experience where Jesus multiplied a tiny amount of food resource to fully satisfy 4,000 people AND they picked up 7 basketfuls of leftovers.
But then they forgot to grab some of that for lunch for their next trip. They just had a single flatbread one person had probably grabbed for a snack.
Whose fault was it? Poor management. Wasted opportunity. Bad stewardship. Selfish? Careless? Forgetful?
While they were freaking out about going hungry, Jesus was on a COMPLETELY different page.
This only freaked them out even more. Until Jesus nails the issue…
“Why are you fussing about forgetting bread? Do still not understand? Are you dull?” [um…. do I need to answer that?]
“Having eyes do you not see?
And having ears do you not hear?
And do you not remember?”
(see Mark 8:16-21 TPT and NASB)
Jesus then walks them through REMEMBERING what had recently happened in their SIGHT, and in their HEARING.
They had an impossible situation. They had a minuscule amount of resources – the amount was laughable rather than taking seriously in actually meeting the need. But Jesus took WHAT THEY DID HAVE REGARDLESS OF HOW SMALL, thanked God for it, broke it up and started to distribute to the need…. and kept distributing… and kept distributing… until ALL NEEDS were FULLY SATISFIED (ie. MORE than they needed) AND they finished with more than they started.
What’s the point?
I was looking at what I didn’t have and freaking out about the gap. Jesus was looking at what I did have and knew it was PLENTY to get the job done WITH HIM.
The key was REMEMBERING what I had SEEN and HEARD.
Ohh…. I was being dull and forgetful. I was fussing about the wrong things.
Keys to Find God and Fight Fear in Your Situation
I must ARM MYSELF with
1. What I have SEEN God already do, and
2. What I have HEARD God already do, and
3. Keep that at the forefront of my MEMORY, and
4. Intentionally MOVE into the gap with
5. Practice GRATTITUDE, and
6. Practice GENEROSITY.
So what about you? What have you been dull and forgetful about in your current situation? Where have you been shrinking back to what you can do in your own ability rather than stepping out where it’s impossible unless you are with Jesus?
What have you recently seen and heard God do? What do you need to remember?
What will you now do?